Spending time apart - An important component of a happy relationship is spending time apart. Don't drown in each other. Continue with your separate interests. It is healthy to have some separate interests and activities and to come back to the relationship refreshed and ready to share your experiences.
Respect your partner-- Treating your sweetheart with respect is likely to get you the same in return. Regularly reminding him/her how much they mean to you will enrich your relationship. Never take your partner for granted.
Honesty is essential -- There has to exist a level of honesty in your relatinship to create a committed love that can stick it out through thick & thin. Mistrust is one of the key deal breakers in a relationship.
Spend time together -- There is no substitute for shared time. When you make a point of being together without interuptions you will form a bond that will get you through life's rough spots.
Communicate!! - We have heard it a thousand times but communication strengthen's the bond between two people and creates emotional closeness.
Little Reminder's To Keep Your Relationship Fulfilling
Love and Relationships
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Don't Say What You Don't Mean
Communication is the key to any relationship. With bad communication problems crop up at unexpected places. What is bad communication? Saying what you don't mean, sting talk, not speaking up for yourself. For example: I am mad at my partner so I act cool and a bit detached for a few days versus letting the person know within a close time frame to the action or reaction that upset you. When you do a "silent treatment" tactic one must remember that the other person isn't psychic! Sting talk is those things said usually in sarcasm to make a point or in anger to purposely hurt the other person. After time we all get to know each other's hot buttons so sting talk can be quite effective. Unfortunately that is how bitterness and resentment is formed. Sting talk usually fosters a foundation of non-communication so it festers and boils until another time when it is triggered. Saying what you don't mean can be a reflex over a situation that has been presented to you that makes you feel threatened. What I get all of the time in my practice is one person telling the other that they want to cool off the relationship for a bit - the other person who is feeling rejected at that moment can provide a response - "well, why don't we just be friends!" This is a response that doesn't work because usually the person does not want that at all. They want to continue the love relationship and not just be friends but out of fear it is better than nothing.
Good relationships foster a pathway of expressionism (I just make up that word!) Both parties should be free to express themselves negatively and positively. What you say can make a big difference to your relationship. If you know your partners sensitivities about a subject, you have to be careful while speaking but you can still speak to overcome any discord or misunderstandings. Just choose your words wisely. If a relationship is slipping it is even more important for communication - not necessarily going over the same problems over and over but pulling information and communication out of your partner that could help you continue the relationship. Freedom in communication can be taken if you are sure that your partner understands you well and vice versa. Loose talk can spoil a relationship so choose your topics and talk wisely but "talk and communicate".
Before and After Confirmation
We call, email or text so many other confirmations in our daily lives why not anchor your approaching date with some type of communication as not only a reminder but a way to say that you are looking forward to spending time with the person. It will also take away your own jitters of the perennial being stood up syndrome. The same holds true after your date, not too soon but the next day again email, phone or text the person anchoring the good feelings that you had with your date (if you really had them). If it was a lousy first date then obviously no contact is necessary. Everyone in the world wants to feel appreciated. In our dating life appreciation and thoughtfulness still rules supreme...happy dating!!!
Physical Contact & Talking Too Closely
Keep a comfortable distance from your date. No draping or hanging over the table and getting touchy feely. Do not make your date uncomfortable by getting too close to them when you talk. People need to feel like they still have their own personal space and if they suddenly feel suffocated, then they will close up and you will not be able to learn as much about them as you would like. The first date in so many ways is a fact finding mission. The purpose of the date is to see if there is enough chemistry to warrant a second date. So, relax, have fun, be interested in the person you are with, who knows this could be your soulmate but you probably won't know until you have gotten to know him a bit better. So much of the first date is common sense & making the person feel good.
Being Late
Being late for a date is more than just being late. It gives the impression that you do not respect your date’s time and that you are also someone that cannot be relied on. Show your date that you value the time that you are going to spend together and show up on time. Being on time is a trait that everyone finds attractive.
Be too Aggressive or Direct
There is a difference being flirty and being too aggressive. There is also a difference between asking questions to get to know your date better and just being too direct. If you like your date, feel free to flirt and have fun, but do not be too touchy feely and do not get sexy with your talk. You do not really know how your date feels at this point and perhaps he is not ready or comfortable going that far yet. Keep your flirting simple and set limits. You can ask questions to your date about their work, hobbies and so on, but do not be too direct and forward with your questions. Don't ask about marriage plans, if divorced about his ex-wife or what caused the divorce, how much money he makes, etc. Remember, this is a first date- do not scare your date away with a “too much too soon” impression.
Things to Avoid on A First Date
Talking on the good old CELL phone. Nothing is ruder than talking on your cell phone during your date, or checking messages constantly while on a date. It is a sure fire way to kill your date because the other person will feel that he is not that important if you want to talk to someone on the phone during the date. If you must keep your phone on, then keep it short and express a little bit about the phone call if appropriate. When the phone rings it breaks the flow of conversation, causes insecurity and keeps the other person wondering if you like them or not..It also show's that you may be bored and uninterested in your date. It is best, to turn your phone off and concentrate on the other person.
Laugh at His/Her Jokes
I know, you are all going - please! But, think about it. Don't you love the positive attention you get when you say something funny. Whether you think your date’s jokes and sense of humor is actually funny, laugh anyway. To laugh at his/her jokes and humor will show the appreciation you have for the efforts they made to make the date interesting. So give him/her a laugh, without being over the top or making it look fake or forced. Again, it is about making the other person feel good about themsevles. Don't you gravitate to people who make you feel good about yourself, well offer the same courtesy to your first date because afterall, if you are attracted to him and would like to see him again, laugh, my dear, laugh!
Make Eye Contact
Making eye contact on a date is very important. It makes the other person feel important and that you are actually interested and paying attention to what he or she is saying.
Give Compliments
Give your date a nice compliment- whether it be on their hair, clothes, smile or whatever you personally notice. Giving compliments will show your date or your mate that you care enough to take the time to observe the efforts they made in putting themselves together. Think how you feel when someone compliments you. It is a great lift and causes you to have positive feelings towards the person giving you the compliment. People want to be with people that make them feel good about themselves.
Things to Do on A First Date
You have heard the wise words - the first impression is the lasting impression. A first date is all about first impressions and naturally, you want to make a good one. With all the pressure and nervousness sometimes we forget the basics of being a good companion whether it is a first date or having lunch with a friend. On your first date you do not want to give any false impressions because that not only short changes yourself but the other person as well. Whether the date works out or not, you should always be remembered as the person who was comfortable and delightful to spend some time with.
Dating Do's and Don'ts
"Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." - Mark Twain
"Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit." - Peter Ustinov
"Love is like a river, never ending as it flows, but gets greater with time!"
Source Unknown
Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.
Franklin P. Jones
“Love is like a Rubix Cube, there are countless numbers of wrong twists and turns, but when you get it right, it looks perfect no matter what way you look at it”
Brian Cramer
“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.”
Thomas Merton
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